2017年4月29日雅思大作文题目
Children today find it difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to school. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?
分析
相信本周参加雅思考试的同学该非常开心,不仅因为这个写作题目是2014年1月18日的原题重现,与2017年3月4日的作文题目【年轻人为什么不喜欢学习?】也密切相关,本专栏曾经详细分析过该题的写作思路,更重要的是,这个题目对我们来说,实在是太熟悉了,我们根本就不愁找不到论点和论据。
孩子们为什么不能专心学习?原因无非就是内因和外因。外因很容易找到,网络游戏的干扰,电视节目的干扰,或者课本太枯燥无聊等等,内因也容易发现,比如现在有很多宣传,不需要读书也能成功,这样孩子们就没有学习的动力了。解决办法也很简单、直接,比如控制孩子们使用网络的时间,同时告诉孩子们读书的重要性(即使不能挣钱,也能让你的生活更充实和幸福)。按照这样的逻辑写,轻松愉快,烤鸭需要注意的就剩下控制语言错误,控制模板使用,尽量体现出自己的写作个性来。
本周唐老师提供一个范文,看起来一点也不绚烂,但平实自然得可爱,适合多数烤鸭模仿。唐老师想再次重申一下雅思写作的几个要点:围绕主题论证,有一定逻辑性【不需要深刻】;语言正确,写清楚【不需要大词长句】;体现出一定的个性【杜绝模板】。做到这几点,你的雅思写作7分梦想就不再遥远了!
7分范文
Students ought to spend most of their time on the school work, but nowadays it is not uncommon that students are simply not able to put their heart to study.
There could be two reasons why this happens. First, today the students are surrounded by so many distractions that they gradually find that learning is too boring and uninteresting. While students two decades ago had nearly no choice but sit in the classroom and read books, students today have easy and fast access to Internet, on which they can do almost all things. For instance, they can play computer games, watch videos, search for any information they need, and chat with their friends, to mention just a few. So, having been used to this kind of “easy” online life, many young people simply cannot put their heart into the more serious and consuming school work.
Another important factor that affects the students' attitude towards their school work is that a good education seems not as important as before. For quite a long time, receiving a good education was the only way for young people to get a decent job and earn a high salary. But now, this is apparently not the case any more. Influenced by business stars like Bill Gates and Steve Jobs, many young people now begin to believe that one’s success does not have much to do the education s/he receives. The students, therefore, are not motivated enough to focus on their learning.
As education of the young is so important to the future of the world, we ought to find ways out of this embarrassing situation. For example, the school and parents should work together to set limits on the time children spend online. Internet is a good great invention, yet obsession with it will certainly reduce the time that should have been put to more serious work. Besides, young people should be made to understand that life is not just about making money, but about having rich and colorful experience and education is the best gateway to that rewarding life.
(349 words)
老师笔记
1
Students ought to spend most of their time on the school work, but nowadays it is not uncommon that students are simply not able to put their heart to study.
学生们应该将大部分时间花在学习上,但今天很常见的却是学生们根本无法专心学习。
(1) 本段是开头段,使用的开门见山法,直接提出现象,但在用词上并不照抄题目,而是体现出变化。
(2) It is not uncommon that... ......并不罕见
(3) Put one’s heart to... 集中精力做......
2
There could be two reasons why this happens. First, today the students are surrounded by so many distractions that they gradually find that learning is too boring and uninteresting. While students two decades ago had nearly no choice but sit in the classroom and read books, students today have easy and fast access to Internet, on which they can do almost all things. For instance, they can play computer games, watch videos, search for any information they need, and chat with their friends, to mention just a few. So, having been used to this kind of “easy” online life, many young people simply cannot put their heart into the more serious and consuming school work.
这种现象发生可能有两个理由。首先,今天的学生被各种各样的诱惑包围着,他们慢慢发现学习太过单调无趣。20年前的学生几无别的选择,只能坐在教室读书,而今天的学生可以又快又方便地进入因特网,在这里他们什么事情都可以完成。比如,可以玩电脑游戏、看电影、查询需要的信息、和朋友聊天,诸如此类。因此,习惯这种“容易的”网上生活后,很多年轻人根本无法再把心思放回到更严肃、更费精力的学业上。
(1)本段分析学生不喜欢学习的个理由,也是浅层次的外部理由:学生因为外部干扰(尤其是互联网的干扰)而讨厌学习。本段的论证思路是:学生发现学习无趣--比较今天的学生和20年前的学生--举例今天的学生可以在网上做什么--上网的结果就是不愿意再认真学习。注意与这个思路匹配的是一些常用句型。比如:while...; so, having done..., they...
(2)Distraction: 干扰
(3)Access:进入;使用
(4)To name just a few:如此等等;诸如此类
(5)Consuming 耗费的(比如time-consuming耗时的;energy-consuming耗能量的)
3
Another important factor that affects the students' attitude towards their school work is that a good education seems not as important as before. For quite a long time, receiving a good education was the only way for young people to get a decent job and earn a high salary. But now, this is apparently not the case any more. Influenced by business stars like Bill Gates and Steve Jobs, many young people now begin to believe that one’s success does not have much to do the education s/he receives. The students, therefore, are not motivated enough to focus on their learning.
另外一个影响学生学习态度的因素是,良好的教育似乎不像以往那么重要了。在很长一段时间内,接受好的教育是年轻人获好工作、挣高工资的路径,但是现在看起来似乎不是那样了。受比尔.盖茨、史蒂夫.乔布斯这些商界明星的影响,很多年轻人现在开始相信,一个人的成功与他/她所受的教育并无多大关系,因此,这些学生就没有动力来专心学习了。
(1)本段讨论学生不喜欢学习的另一个原因,也是更深层次的内在原因:学生不再相信只有受教育才能成功了。本段的论证思路是:主题句--以前的情况--现在的情况--结论。在论证的过程中,顺便举出一些例子,可以展示考生的知识面,同时增强作文的个性化。
(2)Factor 因素
(3)Decent 体面的
(4)Apparently 表面看地;明显地
(5)Motivated 有动力的
4
As education of the young is so important to the future of the world, we ought to find ways out of this embarrassing situation. For example, the school and parents should work together to set limits on the time children spend online. Internet is a good great invention, yet obsession with it will certainly reduce the time that should have been put to more serious work. Besides, young people should be made to understand that life is not just about making money, but about having rich and colorful experience and education is the best gateway to that rewarding life.
年轻人的教育对世界的未来至关重要,因此我们应该找到办法走出这个尴尬的困境。比如,学校和父母应该合作起来,给孩子上网的时间设限,鼓励他们投入更多时间来学习。因特网是伟大的发明,然而过分沉迷于此必将减少用于认真学习的时间。此外,还应该让年轻人明白,生活的意义不仅仅是挣钱,还在于拥有更丰富更精彩的体验,而教育正是抵达那种有价值的生活的通路。
(1)本段针对前面两个原因提出解决方案。本段论证思路是:需要找到解决办法--个办法是限制学生上网时间--过多上网的坏处--第二个办法是让学生明白读书的意义是拥有更丰富精彩的生活。
(1) Embarrassing 令人尴尬的
(2) Set limits on... 给......设限
(3) Obsession (with) 沉迷(于......)
(4) Gateway 通路
(5) Rewarding 有回报的;有价值的
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